Reporter
matthew.chin@guardian.co.tt
You may have heard of his name on the airwaves, seen his alluring smile on billboards, or may have even visited one of his boutiques for your pleasure. But what remains certain across T&T is that there is only one Dr Raj, and there is more to him than the word ‘sex’ conveys.
Born Giriraj Ramnanan, the 60-year-old sexologist and sex health counsellor has helped many people in T&T understand sex health and the intricacies of sexual intercourse to enhance the intimate parts of their lives. However, Dr Raj, the entrepreneur and lover of fedoras, is venturing into the formidable realm of soca with the release of his new groovy soca tune, Bubble Yuh Bakanal featuring chutney-soca artiste Chris Garcia. Reflecting on the many areas of work he has touched on, the sexologist seeks to broaden his career through the love of music that is shared with the rest of his beloved country.
“I have transitioned my life for many different facets, training bodybuilders, sports, business, you name it. The reason why I did ‘Bubble Yuh Bakanal’ was because, I think, as a true Trinidadian, you must have a calypso sung about you or you must be able to sing a calypso. With the help of Garcia, he was instrumental in making it easy for me,” he said.
The song is described by Dr Raj as a mysterious tune with sexual undertones, which he links to himself being the product of calypso icons Mighty Sparrow and Lord Shorty. Bubble Yuh Bakanal was released for streaming on December 6.
“The song is about a stranger in a village that’s causing bacchanal with all the women. It could be you, it could be me, it could be anyone. And the woman is replying to her husband, ‘Ey, I’m just smiling because I found a bunch of plantains.’ So it’s all about being jovial and entertaining. If the song is not entertaining, who’s gonna listen to it anyways?” he said.
Dr Raj, who launched his singing career in May, released three Bollywood cover songs earlier this year. Bubble Yuh Bakanal is his fourth song.
Adventuring into several different roles throughout his life, sex education was not the only area that came naturally to him. When he was in the business of doing radio and television, talking on the radio was second nature as he would have been unashamed to speak on the topics that Trinbagonians had found taboo.
“The first words I said [in the studio] were ‘penis’ and ‘vagina’ and the guy who was in the studio ran out. He said, ‘No one could know that I’m hearing you saying those words. I’m a Catholic.’ And I’m like, ‘What’s wrong with penis and vagina?’” he said.
The father of two does not care what you think of him. But what he does care about is the lingering shame and aversion the country still has around the subject of sex that he prefers to discuss freely without fear. He is also shocked by the reaction he gets from people when they realise he has been a married man for 39 years.
“People are blown away when I tell them I’ve been married for 39 years ... to the same person I’ve been in love with 49 years ago. We are very close. But I’d also say we are very open in terms of her letting me do what I want and I let her do what she wants to do; it’s our life. You’ll never find my wife calling me to find out where I am or what time I’m coming home. Our children grew up very open with us, they can discuss anything,” he said.
During his metamorphosis of becoming ‘Dr Raj’, the pioneer admitted he had to learn about sex in hiding while living in the 80s where the topic of sex and sex education was shunned severely, both at home and in the public domain. Nonetheless, although contemporary T&T can be considered more open today than it had been in the 20th century, still there are strong indicators of hostility towards sexuality and sexual expression, most notably towards members of the LGBT community.
“The LGBT community ... they are an affront to what is “normal”. If you have a child who identifies as homosexual you start to shun that person and you think maybe I should beat it out of him. We do this because we do not want to understand the psychology of it. No two human beings are the same; there are differences in people and differences in sexuality. Some people would say, ‘No one is born gay,’—of course, you can be born gay! We’ve been trained that from the time you hear the word ‘sex’ there’s something evil about it,” he said.
Besides not being a stranger to what consenting adults can do in the bedroom, spousal abuse and porn addiction are constant visitors that arrive at his clinic looking for help. The black and blue bruises and the devastation of meeting the country’s future addicts in their school uniforms are signs of neglect, according to Dr Raj.
“We have to start looking at ways in society to prevent those things. One of those ways is open communication, understanding who you are. Man know thyself first and foremost, know who you truly are and discuss that with your spouse. Porn addiction is also an issue in Trinidad we’re not dealing with. I’ve dealt with students who are so addicted to porn that they fail their classes. They prefer to stay at home, look at porn than go to their classes!” he said.
When he returns home from some of these counselling sessions, Dr Raj said he has had to detoxify himself from the stories of those struggling to make their relationships work. And, you may think, if it’s so bad, why doesn’t he do something else? The answer to this is the undeniable experiences that continue to drive him forward.
“I’ll tell you what it is memorable: helping couples to have children. I’ve had people send me photographs of their children going to school–that is an accomplishment because I help people to have children too. People think I only deal with sex. No! I deal with infertility issues and the psychology of relationships,” he said. Adding, unapologetically, “It’s not only about the sex.”
The sex-positive advocate plans to release more chutney-soca tunes soon with the help of Rishi Ram from Sangeet 106.1FM and other local musicians, saying he does not want to promote a “rum and wine” chutney style, but rather a “river lime” vibe in a way that only he, Dr Raj, can do.
Rapid-fire questions
1. Horn or Tabanca?
Horn– I could handle that.
2. Favourite movie?
East Indian Sholay.
3. ↓To honk a bad drive or cuss it out?
I go let out two cuss in yuh tail.
4. ↓Open or closed relationship?
Open.
5. ↓Favourite book?
Freedom at Midnight.
6. One surprising fact about Dr Raj?
I’m a family man.