I saw the window treatments down in a few houses, a "country people" tradition, and again I'm reflecting on my Mother and the special joy she had about the holidays.Mummy relished the holidays as she busied herself painting the things she had painted just a year before and changing curtains that looked perfectly in place to me.Unfortunately, having already inherited my Mother's innate and evident wonderful qualities for cooking, conversation, wisdom, and congeniality, the Christmas thing escaped me.It's why I regularly had blue, blue Christmases. Very early in life I had resigned myself to never doing as much as others, investing an overwhelming amount of time and money for a holiday that seems to end at around 2 pm–once lunch is served–on December 25.
Now I celebrate Christmas, but I make my own traditions and try never to spend more time nor money than is necessary in any one year.And so, the holiday season is upon us once again. If you are a friend, relative, or caregiver to anyone who has holiday blues especially if that person is an older adult, 65 years and over, you may notice their depression manifesting as a lack of enthusiasm around this time.Generally, in the midst of the bustle, older adults with the blues appear sluggish and subdued. They may be detached from their surroundings and may show little interest in things they once loved about the holidays or family.While many people engage in festivities and count this as a joyous time, if we neglect how confusing and stressful holidays become for the elderly then we can fail to meet the needs of an entire constituency whose spirits depend on us to buoy them through the season.
"Holiday blues" are feelings of profound sadness that can be provoked by all the activities of the holiday season. Seasonal blues can have a particular impact in the lives of older people, according to Barry Lebowitz, PhD, deputy director of UCSD's Stein Institute for Research on Ageing."In some people, the holiday blues represent the exacerbation of an ongoing depressive illness," he says. "Depression is a dangerous and life-threatening illness in older people. Tragically, suicide rates increase with age, specifically for older men. Depression is not a normal part of ageing and should never be ignored or written off."Here are some tips for preparing older adults in your care or circle for the season. These are based on advice from specialists in senior medicine at the University of California, San Diego (UCSD) School of Medicine:
�2 Stroll down memory lane. "Older people whose memories are impaired may have difficulty remembering recent events, but they are often able to share stories and observations from the past, says Lebowitz.These shared memories are important for the young as well–children enjoy hearing about how it was 'when your parents were your age...'." He suggests using picture albums, family videos and music, even theme songs from old radio or TV programmes, to help stimulate memories.
�2 Plan ahead. If older family members tire easily or are vulnerable to over-stimulation, limit the number of activities they are involved in or the length of time they are included. The noise and confusion of a large family gathering can lead to irritability or exhaustion, so schedule time for a nap, if necessary, and consider designating a "quiet room" where an older person can take a break. Assign someone to be the day's companion to the older person, to make sure the individual is comfortable."
�2 Avoid embarrassing moments. Try to avoid making comments that could inadvertently embarrass an older friend or family member. If an older person forgets a recent conversation, for example, don't make it worse by saying, "Don't you remember?"
�2 Be inclusive. Involve everyone in holiday meal preparation, breaking down tasks to include the youngest and oldest family members. "Older adults with physical limitations can still be included in kitchen activities by asking them to do a simple, helpful task, like greasing cooking pans, peeling vegetables, folding napkins or arranging flowers."
�2 Reach out. Social connectedness is especially important at holiday times. "Reaching out to older relatives and friends who are alone is something all of us should do. Loneliness is a difficult emotion for anyone.Recent research with older people has documented that loneliness is associated with major depression and with suicidal thoughts and impulses."
�2 Monitor medications and alcohol. If you have senior family members, be sure to help them adhere to their regular schedule of medications during the frenzy of the holidays. Also, pay attention to their alcohol consumption.
Older adults can feel or be made to feel neglected and alone during the holidays, but planning ahead can ensure a happy holiday for all. For many older adults the holidays can be highly stressful, confusing, or even depressing if their mental, physical and emotional needs are not taken into account.