Charles Kong Soo
Gerard-Paul Wanliss, 53, from Arima, is a photographer and proud single father of Eli who turns 14 soon.
Wanliss’s son was only a year old when he and his partner separated.
The dedicated dad also cares for his elderly 83-year-old ailing father, who is a cancer survivor.
Wanliss also cared for his mother who passed five years ago and suffered from dementia for the last three years of her life.
Holding down a job while loving and caring for his son and parents, providing general support and giving guidance to Eli is not an easy task.
But while it may be challenging, it is truly a labour of love for Wanliss to take care of his family.
Wanliss has been a single dad for 13 years. “I’ve been a single parent to Eli and had virtually no support system. After his mother left, I never really got back into the game.”
Wanliss added that being a single father can often be demanding and challenges are going to arise, but all one can do is try his best and focus on the most immediate matter at hand.
He said children also face many challenges in today’s society such as peer pressure and bullying which parents need to help them navigate.
Concerning his son, Wanliss said, “He tries his best, it’s challenging at times with some of his subjects. He’s in Form Two at CIC and enjoys going to school and being around his friends.”
Wanliss also takes care of his father. He said his father’s mobility was affected because of his knees and he needed assistance in many areas. He also prepares his meals for him.
While his dad is coherent, he uses a walker, so Wanliss tries not to be away for very long, and after a photography assignment, he heads straight back home.
He said he does not have a social life; going out and lime with friends and having a few drinks is not possible because of the demands of being a single parent and caregiver, in addition to financial constraints.
Wanliss said a friend suggested that he needed to get out more often and have a relationship.
He said that in today’s world, it is very difficult to have a relationship, especially for a single parent with financial responsibilities such as house and car maintenance, groceries, bills, his son’s school, and his dad’s care.
Wanliss said what he loved about his job as a photographer is that it is the closest thing to social activities as he gets to meet people at cultural, religious and other events.
The doting dad loves to take his son on drives, chase sunsets and go to the beach where they take memorable photographs.
Parenting tips
* Assist your child in their school work and projects whenever possible.
* Parents should set proper examples as good role models for their children to emulate
* Don’t blame youths for all social ills; they’re watching adults behaving badly, drinking, using drugs, cursing, bad driving, playing the field etc
* Use communication instead of corporal punishment and ‘tough love’ to affect change
* Stop verbally abusing children and using destructive words and limitations such as good for nothing, stupidee, dotish, you can’t do that, you are not smart enough etc to reverse the trend for a shift in behaviour and action.
* Change negative stereotypes